March 12
Fucking shit.
Never before In my life have I been so sad
because of a goodbye. Except for the time I had to say
goodbye to my grandfather at the airport in Tehran,
knowing that he was going to die, that it was our last
moment together, that we would never get to hold
eachother again and that it would b
e the last time
I'd be able to look into his eyes and tell him I love him.
But apart from that particular time, I've never been
so sad because of a goodbye as I am right now.
I was all happy and smiles,
but it's extremely hard to look them in the
eyes and smile when some of them are on the
verge of crying. I.. I'm just. Sigh.. I don't know.
I don't cry for stuff like this.
But I've been crying ever since I stepped into my
room here in the Old House. All the presents..
All the notes. It's just so freaking hard to deal with..
They give me all of their stuff.
As a westerner you'd look at it and see junk.
But it's not junk for them and it is not junk for me.
So much devotion and love that they've put into it.
Just to make me smile, just to make me happy.
I don't know. I'm just.. soo.. soo.. sad right now.
They have nothing, yet they give me everything.
I'd smile for them for free. Everyday, for free.
Their english is really bad, and I know that they've
spent last night doing their best to even find the
right words to write down "I miss you". It just.. It feels.
Sigh...
There is this one girl, wrote me a whole letter.
It just burns to read it. I don't know what to feel.
I guess I should be happy, and I guess I am..
but I keep thinking of the conditions they live under.
Yet, even so.. they give me all this stuff.
Their favourite bracelets. Etc...
I can buy hundred if not even thousands of these..
They have one or two, and they give it to me.
Some even do handmade ones, they're soo cute.
GAH OVERLOAD CUTENESS.
Damn...
My brain can't handle this shit.
I'm gonna go and feed the dogs.
What use is it to sit here and be sad?
These kids are happier than 10 western kids together.
It's just. I guess I'm in chock.
I knew I was coming here,
and what I'd give would be returned a thousand times.
I was wrong and that, so much. Because they don't give
back a thousand times they give you back 1 billion times.
Sorry. Massive rant.. I know. But it's just hard.
That's all I'm saying, and I want you guys to know that.
If I hear anyone at home complaining about their sucky
life and their situation in life or minor problems..
That really shouldn't be considered "problems"..
Fuck.. I'll slit your fucking throat and stab you
50 times in the chest because you are fucking LUCKY.
Don't you ever fucking forget that. EVER.
Grrrrrr.
Emotional rollercoaster.
Fucking shit.
Don't read this if :
- you're easily offended.
- a major newb
- don't like rants
- you're a beaver
- want to spend your time on something worthy it
Never before In my life have I been so sad
because of a goodbye. Except for the time I had to say
goodbye to my grandfather at the airport in Tehran,
knowing that he was going to die, that it was our last
moment together, that we would never get to hold
eachother again and that it would be the last time
I'd be able to look into his eyes and tell him I love him.
But apart from that particular time, I've never been
But apart from that particular time, I've never been
so sad because of a goodbye as I am right now.
I was all happy and smiles,
but it's extremely hard to look them in the
eyes and smile when some of them are on the
verge of crying. I.. I'm just. Sigh.. I don't know.
I don't cry for stuff like this.
I don't cry for stuff like this.
But I've been crying ever since I stepped into my
room here in the Old House. All the presents..
All the notes. It's just so freaking hard to deal with..
They give me all of their stuff.
They give me all of their stuff.
As a westerner you'd look at it and see junk.
But it's not junk for them and it is not junk for me.
So much devotion and love that they've put into it.
Just to make me smile, just to make me happy.
I don't know. I'm just.. soo.. soo.. sad right now.
They have nothing, yet they give me everything.
I'd smile for them for free. Everyday, for free.
Their english is really bad, and I know that they've
Their english is really bad, and I know that they've
spent last night doing their best to even find the
right words to write down "I miss you". It just.. It feels.
Sigh...
There is this one girl, wrote me a whole letter.
There is this one girl, wrote me a whole letter.
It just burns to read it. I don't know what to feel.
I guess I should be happy, and I guess I am..
but I keep thinking of the conditions they live under.
Yet, even so.. they give me all this stuff.
Their favourite bracelets. Etc...
I can buy hundred if not even thousands of these..
I can buy hundred if not even thousands of these..
They have one or two, and they give it to me.
Some even do handmade ones, they're soo cute.
GAH OVERLOAD CUTENESS.
GAH OVERLOAD CUTENESS.
Damn...
My brain can't handle this shit.
My brain can't handle this shit.
I'm gonna go and feed the dogs.
What use is it to sit here and be sad?
These kids are happier than 10 western kids together.
It's just. I guess I'm in chock.
It's just. I guess I'm in chock.
I knew I was coming here,
and what I'd give would be returned a thousand times.
I was wrong and that, so much. Because they don't give
back a thousand times they give you back 1 billion times.
Sorry. Massive rant.. I know. But it's just hard.
Sorry. Massive rant.. I know. But it's just hard.
That's all I'm saying, and I want you guys to know that.
If I hear anyone at home complaining about their sucky
If I hear anyone at home complaining about their sucky
life and their situation in life or minor problems..
That really shouldn't be considered "problems"..
Fuck.. I'll slit your fucking throat and stab you
50 times in the chest because you are fucking LUCKY.
Don't you ever fucking forget that. EVER.
Grrrrrr.
Grrrrrr.
Emotional rollercoaster.
Kommentarer
Postat av: Emilia
lol jag börjar också gråta :<
Skulle skrivit nåt här, men alltså.. Det kommer inte fram nåt. Ta hand om dig Maral
Postat av: Ernie
1.
I'm happy you can appreciate their gifts in the way that you do :).
2.
What do you against beavers? :D
Postat av: Oliver
I love this blog!!!
You are so awesome! Sharing in others' joy is <3
Postat av: Ernie
Have*!!!!
Trackback
